Valentine’s Day was this past Wednesday.
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I saw frat boy hopefuls setting up tablecloths in Norris, huge bouquets of roses on doorsteps, and post after affectionate post about everyone’s significant others. Love was in the… air?
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When talking about the dating scene here at Northwestern, “fruitful” isn’t the term most people would use. And it’s not just us.
The American Enterprise Institute’s Survey Center on American Life conducted a dating poll in 2023. The results showed that more and more young Americans are single.
53% of Gen Z-ers interviewed said they “Enjoy being single more than being in a relationship”. A whopping 73% said they “Have more important priorities at the moment” than dating.
LISA WALSH: We know singlehood is on the rise. That’s been happening for some decades now. So for example, I think the percent of people who were unmarried was at about 33% in 1950, and right now it’s at 49% according to the latest U.S. Census Data. So there is this rising trend in people who are not married.
That was Dr. Lisa Walsh, a postdoctoral research associate at UCLA. Her research focuses on the why’s and how’s of life satisfaction, and particularly how close relationships factor into that.
According to her, psychologists have witnessed this increasing trend of singlehood for a while now.
WALSH: More and more people are delaying marriage or foregoing it entirely, and that’s not just happening in the US. That’s happening across the world we see that.
David Schieber, an assistant professor of instruction in Northwestern’s sociology department, draws a connection between this shift and modernization in the workforce – particularly in relation to women.
DAVID SCHIEBER: As women have entered the workforce and become more interested in, you know, having professional careers, especially highly educated upper socioeconomic status women postpone long term relationships knowing that they’re more focused on a career or education at that point.
Schieber also discusses money as a significant motivation behind singlehood.
SCHIEBER: A lot of sociology research has said shows a connection in, you know, time of marriage or even whether or not someone gets married is wealth. Also, just how much, you know, financial stability a person has in their life. And typically the argument goes – people do not want to settle down and get married until they have some or full financial stability.
For Gen Z, it’s possible our widespread singleness is rooted in both of these factors. Maybe the more we see of the current job market and our career prospects, the more we realize how uncertain our financial futures are. And so erupts this mindset that our professional lives come before our romantic ones.
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People (we) are pushing off long term relationships. But if we’re not getting cuffed in college, what happens next?
According to Schieber, students who meet their partner later in their professional paths tend to marry within the same socio-economic statuses. Med school student meets med school student and they become a doctor-doctor couple. An associate attorney meets another lawyer and they become two legal partners partnered together.
However, these sorts of late pairings can be drivers of wealth inequality.
SCHIEBER: I have seen people talk about that as one potential driver behind inequality. These days, as opposed to 50 years ago when a doctor may marry a woman, and while it’s super gendered because it was 75 years ago, like a male doctor would marry a woman but the woman – it was much more, you know, spread out of what socioeconomic status that woman might come from. Now, it’s a doctor, a male doctor marries a woman doctor, and it concentrates like two $200,000 incomes into one household. That’s a big one of the drivers of inequality.
On a more individual level, singlehood doesn’t really affect people’s mental or emotional health. Despite what people typically say.
WALSH: The predominant narrative in our society is often that, you know, find a romantic partner, get married, then you’ll be happy. But that formula doesn’t seem to play out in the research…
In her research, Walsh says she found that 100% of single people follow a life satisfaction pattern to 79% of coupled people. In other words…
WALSH: There are very happy single people, very happy couple people, very unhappy single people, very unhappy couples. There’s a variety of ways to be happy or not happy, and that doesn’t -necessarily fall on relationship status.
According to Walsh, it’s less about if you have a significant other or not and more about the important social connections you hold in general. These relationships can manifest through a romantic partner, but also through close friends and family members.
I guess the lesson of today’s story is this: young Americans are increasingly single, and perhaps we’re okay with it. Because there’s no one way to live this life. And also… my biggest worry right now isn’t getting a boyfriend, it’s getting an internship for the summer.
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For WNUR news, I’m Michelle Hwang.
